There are just some things I home school child has an opportunity to do that just couldn't happen if they were in a more traditional school environment. There are just some things gifted children do that makes much more sense in your own home, than much of the world would understand. Such is the case with my eldest and his pet ferret.
Ferrets make pretty interesting pets - they are full of energy, love to play, love to explore, and the love to socialize. While cute, they are a handful as a pet - which is why we realize our home isn't ready for one. My son, however, decided he was ready for one - in walks his Webkinz Ferret; yes, that plush stuffed animal with an online presence. Now, many kids have Webkinz, and many kids go online everyday to feed, water, walk, and play with their stuffed animal in a virtual world. My eldest will sometimes do just that. However, he doesn't want a virtual pet - he wants a real one. And here we come to the place where only a parents of gifted kids will understand, and where all parents who home school breathe a sigh of relief - the pet.
We visited the local pet store that carries ferrets - every day for a
week for an hour! We now continue to go on a regular basis - so that he
can watch the ferrets ad monitor their behavior.Wanting to be a good pet owner, my son had me purchase every pet ferret book available. We brought a couple of cute children's books about ferrets - but those were fictional stories to be read with amusement. While fun to read, they didn't prepare him for his pet. So, we moved on to the real deal - books geared toward adult pet owners. He has had me read to him books on how to train your pet ferret, understanding ferrets, even "the Dummies Guide to Ferrets". He could now teach a college level course on ferrets! We even found a video with ferret owners showing off their ferrets (and talking about the dying process as ferrets have a life expectancy of around 8 years). Understanding the entire aspect of ferret ownership, he felt himself ready.
So his Webkinz went from being simply a plush toy - to for all intents and purposes a real ferret. Since we weren't willing to pay $200 for a ferret cage for a toy ferret - he build his own ferret habitat. It has everything a ferret needs including a hammock, a litter box, feeding bowl, water bowl, and even toys. It is multilevel because ferrets like to climb. Knowing ferrets like to go outside - he make a custom leash and harness to fit his "pet" perfectly and even created the perfect pet carrier. He takes his "pet" with him on most of our outings.
How serious is he in this endeavor? I am writing this at 6:30 in the morning and he just got out of bed to get breakfast for his ferret! He can't keep a hungry pet waiting.
While for about 30 minutes of this experience I was concerned, I have been overjoyed the rest of the time. Yes, the neighbors may think they entire family has gone bonkers (we call the "pet" by name and often ask my eldest how the little guy is doing and if he wants to play), but this is healthy. He hasn't moved him any closer to securing a real ferret and he understands that (ferrets are a LOT of work), but he has moved a lot closer to figuring out how to solve his own problems and be the master of his own destiny.
His creativity and problem solving have been impeccable in with this experience. Other than my husband using the hole puncher for the hammock, my son had created the entire habitat on his own. He is also continuing to incorporate new information that he finds. For instance, he learned that ferrets do well with another ferret - so he has started to make the habitat livable for two ferrets. He has increased the number of litter boxes, added a few more toys, and enlarged the sleeping space. He is all set for his new ferret. He has no idea my husband ordered one for him - we are encouraging this journey.
An amazing thing is that he is getting many of the benefits of owning a pet - his ferret has a calming effect on him, he will hold it close in uncomfortable situations (trips to the doctor, intensive vision therapy, and even trips to the dentist), he is learning responsibility, increasing his empathy, and learning responsible pet ownership. I am not sure he would gain more from actually having a real ferret (okay, maybe learning that an animal will actually bite you if you don't handle it properly). All the lessons he could learn from a real pet are probably best learned when he is older - he is only six after all. But "I" am very happy about what he has gained and continues to learn. He has taken on this challenge the way I have come to expect from profoundly gifted children - a desire for intensive and deep knowledge (he recently asked to build a scale model of the skeleton of a ferret), and immense amount of creativity, and the laser focus of a scud missile. I am not sure how long this phase will last, but we are all enjoying the "pet" ferret, but I am mostly enjoying watching my son embrace something he loves and a passion he has so thoroughly.
Friday, May 25, 2012
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
The Eyes Have it: Our journey through vision therapy
When my eldest was diagnosed with dyslexia, our amazing psychologist (Dr. Spomenka Newman) gave us the wonderful advice of having his vision tested as well as his hearing. Now, we believed as many people – that the trip to the local “eye store” where they had clearly told us he (as well as his younger siblings) had 20/20 vision – so there were no problems with his eyes. We found out quickly that there is quite a bit of difference between 20/20 vision and getting a better understanding of how the eyes function together as well as with the brain.
When we did our initial testing with a developmental ophthalmologist I almost fell out of my chair. While he could in fact see 20/20, that was of little comfort when we saw everything else that affected the way his eyes worked. We found out he had severe convergence problems – meaning his eyes didn’t work together to see one picture, but each eye saw its own separate picture. He also had issues with eye teaming, meaning his eyes would compete for dominance instead of working together to show one overall picture. The best way to describe it is if the colors on your television screen fought to determine which would be brightest (this extinguishing the others) instead of working together to form an accurate picture of the world using all available colors. He wasn’t seeing in “HD” as he should have been. His eyes would fight to show just their own view of the world instead of allowing both eyes to work at the same time providing depth.
So, we started in on our vision therapy journey. About five months in to therapy, the Doctors we were using sold their practice to another team. While this was a big unsettling at first, it was actually the best thing that could have happened. They sold their practice to their mentors who were on the cutting edge of the field. They brought out eldest in for a more thorough exam and we again were amazed by what we saw. Along with the initial issues we were working on, we found he also had almost no periphery vision – he was using tunnel vision almost exclusively. This helped to explain the walking into walls and not being able to find things that were sitting almost right in front of him. He also had issues with his hearing. Seems are son heard “too well”. He could hear at such a high level it was off the scales which could be measured on their machines. While having very acute hearing might sound good, it is actually overwhelming. To hear birds chirping that are over a block away or hearing thunder clap that is miles away – you are always being bombarded with sound. It can get so overwhelming that your brain works to actually cut the sound out – which can lead to hearing problems. Another issue was that, like his eyes, his ears weren’t hearing together. At some frequencies, he would hear more in one ear than the other. This also causes distress as you can hear that stupid bird in one ear, but not the other. Kind of like someone whispering in your ear – someone that isn’t there. Not only would it be annoying, it might also start to give you a complex!
So, we are in the middle of vision therapy to help our son have a more normal sensory existence. We were doing traditional in office therapy once a week, but with his additional issues of hearing being discovered we are embarking on a more complete sensory therapy. In a few weeks he will have an intensive, in office therapy session that will focus on multiple sensory areas. The goal is to work as a bit of a defibulator if you will that will “shock” the senses into working as a team. Basically, he will lay on a table that slowly spins. It will also play soothing music at various decibel levels and he will watch a light lamp that flashes colors in a particular sequence. This will happen for 20 minutes, twice a day, for 12 straight days. He will then have 18 days of light therapy in our home. The goal if for the senses to be forced to learn to work together – getting all levels to be manageable for him to have a normal existence and not be overwhelmed by the world around him.
I will definitely give a report of our experience. We are hoping for good things. Especially since his four year old siblings had their vision and hearing tested and they also have some similar issues. They are a little too young to start therapy, but I will be trained to do some in home things with them to see if we can start to correct some of their issues while they are still young in the most gentle way. They also got prescribed some low dosage reading glasses to help the ward off the near sightedness that seems to be trying to creep in. Oh the joys of parenting twice exceptional children!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Beating the winter blues
Today was the first really cold day (okay, cold for the south, but still) and it really got me thinking about how we are going to make sure we beat the winter blues rut. One thing I did was sign the kids up for some classes/activities. I was excited to find just the things I was looking for. The first is art! My eldest will be taking a ceramics class at the local art museum. Not to be outdone, the twins will be taking their own art class. Lucky for me, the two classes are at the same location at the same time - yes! Those with multiple children of various ages know my pain about different places at different times! The next is science classes (same place, but unfortunately not the say day or time). My eldest will have a science class once a month while the twins will have a class twice a month. They will also be continuing in a weekly Mandarin class.
For more extracurricular activities we will be attending an "open gym". This is a weekly 2 hour block of time for homeschoolers to come and have some neat gymnasium fun. The good thing about this time is there are a variety of ages that attend. The only downside is there aren't structured activities. I think a rousing game of "duck, duck, goose" is actually good for kids! However, the time is there weekly and its free - so I won't look a gift horse in the mouth!
We also started our robotics club which is mainly made up of our kids a couple friends - but at least there will be some weekly interaction for a couple of months. Just to jazz things up a bit my daughter will be having a tea party with friends in a couple weeks as well.
I put in a mid sized order for arts and crafts supplies from Oriental Trading - and yes, we purchased some new games for the Wii. I figure the important things is to stay AHEAD of the winter blues!
For more extracurricular activities we will be attending an "open gym". This is a weekly 2 hour block of time for homeschoolers to come and have some neat gymnasium fun. The good thing about this time is there are a variety of ages that attend. The only downside is there aren't structured activities. I think a rousing game of "duck, duck, goose" is actually good for kids! However, the time is there weekly and its free - so I won't look a gift horse in the mouth!
We also started our robotics club which is mainly made up of our kids a couple friends - but at least there will be some weekly interaction for a couple of months. Just to jazz things up a bit my daughter will be having a tea party with friends in a couple weeks as well.
I put in a mid sized order for arts and crafts supplies from Oriental Trading - and yes, we purchased some new games for the Wii. I figure the important things is to stay AHEAD of the winter blues!
Monday, November 7, 2011
Spicing up math and reading
One thing we do a little differently in our homeschool is to mix and match curriculum. I mix and match in two very key areas - reading and math. Normally, these are the two areas families decide to choose one curriculum and stick to it.
There are a couple of reasons why I like to pull sources from various curriculum. The first is that it allows the children to have some repetition, that doesn't really "look" like repetition. While most gifted children learn material in as little as two repetitions - I personally like to see my children show a skill more than that. However, my children can easily detect a pattern (and most curriculum goes into a pattern) and they don't even need to look at the page to tell me the right answer. This is particularly important in math.
For reading, since my eldest is dyslexic he needs a lot of opportunity to read aloud. However, reading from just one type of reading program can lead to boredom - for him and for me! Being able to spice up reading selections, but still stay within his current reading abilities is wonderful. It also keeps him from detecting the patterns of books too quickly.
I also want my children to not get too dependent on any one style of information. For instance, most math programs will stick to one font. This might not seem important on the surface - but numbers written in different fonts can look quite unique. Also - some books will give math programs horizontally while others will give them vertical. Some books use word problems, some use visuals, some use numerals only. I want my kids to get practice solving problems in a large variety of ways. We can't easily detect the future, so preparing broadly is a big factor in our home school.
With that said, we do tend to have a "spine" for our major subjects. This is a primary curriculum that I use to determine the sequence in which we will introduce new information. However, I use as many as five different reading curriculum programs and five different math curriculum programs. It takes a bit more effort in staying organized - but it really allows us to have variety and challenge from a number of different levels.
For reading, "Understanding the Logic of English" is our spine. We also utilize Reading Horizons (both the teacher led and the computer based program), Bob Books, StarFall (both the computer based program and the books). We use some Scholastic sources as well as four different handwriting workbook programs. I also throw in some Montessori materials and other hands on sources to give us even more variety.
For math, "Singapore Math" is our spine. We also utilize "Life of Fred Elementary Series", Kumon Math workbooks, Montessori Materials, occasional activities from Family Math, and lots of different hands on learning materials.
I will admit, this approach isn't for everyone. Some people like order and some children need a much more narrow focus - especially if they struggle with ADD/ADHD or some learning disabilities. If you are a family that likes order and wants to know exactly how long a program will take and when you will move on - this may not be something you want to tackle. Finally, if you are required to turn in lesson plans - writing one for this type of study is horrible I will admit.
However, if your family likes variety, don't be afraid to mix and match core materials. Also, if your child attends a traditional school - definitely give them extra practice in materials that are presented vastly different from their school curriculum. Often times, parents make the mistake of wanting to present home learning materials consistent with the school materials. While this sounds good in theory, it boxes children in. If the school district changes materials, or if you move to a new school using a completely different program - children that have been taught just one way can struggle - even if they know the material.
So, if variety really is the "spice of life" - make sure to put some into your learning as well!
There are a couple of reasons why I like to pull sources from various curriculum. The first is that it allows the children to have some repetition, that doesn't really "look" like repetition. While most gifted children learn material in as little as two repetitions - I personally like to see my children show a skill more than that. However, my children can easily detect a pattern (and most curriculum goes into a pattern) and they don't even need to look at the page to tell me the right answer. This is particularly important in math.
For reading, since my eldest is dyslexic he needs a lot of opportunity to read aloud. However, reading from just one type of reading program can lead to boredom - for him and for me! Being able to spice up reading selections, but still stay within his current reading abilities is wonderful. It also keeps him from detecting the patterns of books too quickly.
I also want my children to not get too dependent on any one style of information. For instance, most math programs will stick to one font. This might not seem important on the surface - but numbers written in different fonts can look quite unique. Also - some books will give math programs horizontally while others will give them vertical. Some books use word problems, some use visuals, some use numerals only. I want my kids to get practice solving problems in a large variety of ways. We can't easily detect the future, so preparing broadly is a big factor in our home school.
With that said, we do tend to have a "spine" for our major subjects. This is a primary curriculum that I use to determine the sequence in which we will introduce new information. However, I use as many as five different reading curriculum programs and five different math curriculum programs. It takes a bit more effort in staying organized - but it really allows us to have variety and challenge from a number of different levels.
For reading, "Understanding the Logic of English" is our spine. We also utilize Reading Horizons (both the teacher led and the computer based program), Bob Books, StarFall (both the computer based program and the books). We use some Scholastic sources as well as four different handwriting workbook programs. I also throw in some Montessori materials and other hands on sources to give us even more variety.
For math, "Singapore Math" is our spine. We also utilize "Life of Fred Elementary Series", Kumon Math workbooks, Montessori Materials, occasional activities from Family Math, and lots of different hands on learning materials.
I will admit, this approach isn't for everyone. Some people like order and some children need a much more narrow focus - especially if they struggle with ADD/ADHD or some learning disabilities. If you are a family that likes order and wants to know exactly how long a program will take and when you will move on - this may not be something you want to tackle. Finally, if you are required to turn in lesson plans - writing one for this type of study is horrible I will admit.
However, if your family likes variety, don't be afraid to mix and match core materials. Also, if your child attends a traditional school - definitely give them extra practice in materials that are presented vastly different from their school curriculum. Often times, parents make the mistake of wanting to present home learning materials consistent with the school materials. While this sounds good in theory, it boxes children in. If the school district changes materials, or if you move to a new school using a completely different program - children that have been taught just one way can struggle - even if they know the material.
So, if variety really is the "spice of life" - make sure to put some into your learning as well!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Pulse Check for our Home School Journey
We are three months into our home school year and I thought it would be a great time for a "pulse check". I think its good to ask how are things going thus far, are my expectations being met, and is there anything I would like to change.
The first question I will tackle is how are things going. I can honestly say things are going very well. Some of that is because I was willing to be a bit flexible in our plans. While I am roughly following the plans I had for this year, we are doing them at a different pace. We are still moving ahead in math, science, and reading - but our schedule is much more laid back than I originally anticipated. Its not that we aren't getting things done, it that things get done so much faster than I thought they would. If I dedicated the time to their "school work" I originally thought I would - my four year old twins would be doing third or fourth grade work by now! We literally do a chapter of math every time we sit down and focus on it. Its not that we are rushing, its just when the kids get into a "zone" they are really focused. So, instead of chugging along at breakneck speed - we take things in spurts and follow lots of rabbit trails along the way. I also added additional curriculum. We are following 2 1/2 math curriculum at this point. We are doing Singapore Math, Life of Fred Math, as we utilize Montessori resources. I also throw in some Kumon Workbooks for fun. All of my kids are still working at least one grade level ahead in math (this is in addition to their grade skipped levels). For reading - we are using Understanding the Logic of English, Bob Books, and Starfall. This approach is providing the depth my kids desire along with a good amount of diversity to keep their attention.
When it comes to my expectations being met - I would say we are "sort of" there. I envisioned our school days being a bit more structured than they are. I like our more unstructured approach, but this is still off base from my original intent. Thankfully our weekly newsletter is providing me an opportunity to catalog fairly well the things that we are doing. I think I will also need to add a more structured account of the things we accomplish though - for my own cataloging purposes. However, my expectations are being met in that my children are genuinely happy about their experience and they are learning a lot. They don't ask about "going to school" - which is an honest fear I had. They also don't ask for additional interaction with other children. We often see children on days at the park, my eldest takes home school science classes, and their after school Chinese Club at a local private school provides a pretty good amount of age appropriate interaction. If he really wanted "more" we could arrange it - but right now even he is content with what he gets. I thought we would be spending more time in a co-op type setting, but there just aren't enough hours in the day for that. Right now the kids are fine with that.
As far as what I would change, there are some things I really need to do in more set intervals. One is music practice. We really should be practicing at home much more and probably on a more set schedule. I just haven't found a good "time" in our day to make that happen. I would also like to see us utilize more of our resources for phonological awareness and articulation. The kids are showing good progress in the area, but I would like for this intervention to be close to wrapping up by the end of our school year. I would also like to see more focus on some of our "life skills" than what I have been doing. For instance, my kids need to be more consistent in cleaning their rooms and putting their toys away.
Overall, this journey has been more rewarding than I thought it would be and I look forward to all life has in store for us!
The first question I will tackle is how are things going. I can honestly say things are going very well. Some of that is because I was willing to be a bit flexible in our plans. While I am roughly following the plans I had for this year, we are doing them at a different pace. We are still moving ahead in math, science, and reading - but our schedule is much more laid back than I originally anticipated. Its not that we aren't getting things done, it that things get done so much faster than I thought they would. If I dedicated the time to their "school work" I originally thought I would - my four year old twins would be doing third or fourth grade work by now! We literally do a chapter of math every time we sit down and focus on it. Its not that we are rushing, its just when the kids get into a "zone" they are really focused. So, instead of chugging along at breakneck speed - we take things in spurts and follow lots of rabbit trails along the way. I also added additional curriculum. We are following 2 1/2 math curriculum at this point. We are doing Singapore Math, Life of Fred Math, as we utilize Montessori resources. I also throw in some Kumon Workbooks for fun. All of my kids are still working at least one grade level ahead in math (this is in addition to their grade skipped levels). For reading - we are using Understanding the Logic of English, Bob Books, and Starfall. This approach is providing the depth my kids desire along with a good amount of diversity to keep their attention.
When it comes to my expectations being met - I would say we are "sort of" there. I envisioned our school days being a bit more structured than they are. I like our more unstructured approach, but this is still off base from my original intent. Thankfully our weekly newsletter is providing me an opportunity to catalog fairly well the things that we are doing. I think I will also need to add a more structured account of the things we accomplish though - for my own cataloging purposes. However, my expectations are being met in that my children are genuinely happy about their experience and they are learning a lot. They don't ask about "going to school" - which is an honest fear I had. They also don't ask for additional interaction with other children. We often see children on days at the park, my eldest takes home school science classes, and their after school Chinese Club at a local private school provides a pretty good amount of age appropriate interaction. If he really wanted "more" we could arrange it - but right now even he is content with what he gets. I thought we would be spending more time in a co-op type setting, but there just aren't enough hours in the day for that. Right now the kids are fine with that.
As far as what I would change, there are some things I really need to do in more set intervals. One is music practice. We really should be practicing at home much more and probably on a more set schedule. I just haven't found a good "time" in our day to make that happen. I would also like to see us utilize more of our resources for phonological awareness and articulation. The kids are showing good progress in the area, but I would like for this intervention to be close to wrapping up by the end of our school year. I would also like to see more focus on some of our "life skills" than what I have been doing. For instance, my kids need to be more consistent in cleaning their rooms and putting their toys away.
Overall, this journey has been more rewarding than I thought it would be and I look forward to all life has in store for us!
Friday, October 14, 2011
Kids in the Kitchen!
Yes, gifted kids need to eat too! Okay, this isn't really limited to a post about homeschooling gifted kids - this is about a great opportunity to expand the experiences of children allowing them to learn more than just "book knowledge". Cooking with children teaches so many amazingly important skills!
One thing cooking does is allow children to come face-to-face and deal with perfectionism. This is a common and constant threat to gifted children - feeling they must be perfect. The great thing about cooking is that even though what you do may not be perfect - it can still be good! That cake may have fallen flat - but it still taste wonderful! You may have used the wrong spice - but that mistake helped you discover and new and still amazing recipe. You may have forgotten to add the creamed soup at the "perfect moment", but it still got incorporated just perfectly and all was not lost. Even when you face an absolute disaster - while disappointing it can still be fun. And even when its done wrong - you still get to learn something. Also with cooking, doing it well takes practice. Very few people are perfect right out of the gate. Children can learn resilience as well as realize you don't have to be perfect at something from the start (a far cry from the 100's they often get on their school work).
Cooking fosters creativity. Just think of how many things can be added to pancake batter to make a new experience with every bite! We have added chocolate chips, mint chips, blue berries - so many wonderful things. I love putting out frosting and allowing my children to decorate cake waffles (cake batter cooked on a waffle maker) in any way their heart desires. Choosing the toppings for a pizza, deciding what veggies go on a platter - the possibilities are limited only be the imagination.
Cooking allows for individuality. My children now fully understand that everyone has different tastes. The understand one brother loves chocolate while the other isn't a big fan (although he did learn he likes Hersey kisses). My daughter loves to talk about how sometimes she likes chocolate and sometimes she doesn't. They know its okay for one to like white rice while the other rice pilaf. They love being able to chose maple syrup or peanut butter as a topping. I often times will set out a platter of 5 - 7 choices and allow them to build their own sandwich or salad.
Cooking allows them to try something new or go out on a limb in a safe environment. I love how we can explore ancient cultures and customs through food. My children can learn there is "good" and "bad" in all cultures in a safe way. I like the bread, but not the fruit. Its much nicer to show the diversity within people in this environment before we get to the bloody wars and battles! It also helps them to embrace newer cultures they are learning about. My children are learning Mandarin and they enjoy eating Chinese food and even had a wonderful Dim Sum meal following a class. We are now ready to try and make some of that on our own. We can see that it is okay to embrace some things from other cultures while not incorporating the totality of beliefs outside your own.
Cooking can provide gentle exposure for the senses. Many gifted children have overexcitabilities, and mine are no exception. They can be sensitive to textures, tastes, and smells. Cooking at home allows them to gently see what they can handle and what they can't. It also allows us to gently push the envelope to develop greater capacity.
Cooking has no age requirements. Many gifted children are ready for large challenges, but are often blocked through age requirements. With proper supervision, children can challenge themselves to their hearts content. Despite their age, no one can deny what they eventually produce. It breaks down the barrier. Cooking also allows for them to branch off into other areas. For instance, they may cook a meal- then present the historical significance of that meal. They may build a structure using food. They may produce an art project with food. They may do science project by using food. They may produce a recipe, then write a story surrounding that food.
Cooking links them to their family and culture. Being gifted often means being different. Cooking a family meal or a culturally significant dish links them to others in their "tribe". Something that isn't bound by intellect or what makes them different. Being unique is great, but sometimes we want to feel a part of something bigger than ourselves. Children that might fret about death or the future can see that some things last a long time - even beyond the brief time of particular individuals on earth. They can see for themselves they are connected to others, even while being unique themselves.
Finally, cooking allows for togetherness. I tend to be a distracted person and I love multitasking. Cooking with my kids requires me to give them my undivided attention at that time. They get all of me (or else the house might burn down!) and they enjoy that. There is no excuse for my lack of focus at times and I am working on that. In the meantime - kids to the kitchen!!
One thing cooking does is allow children to come face-to-face and deal with perfectionism. This is a common and constant threat to gifted children - feeling they must be perfect. The great thing about cooking is that even though what you do may not be perfect - it can still be good! That cake may have fallen flat - but it still taste wonderful! You may have used the wrong spice - but that mistake helped you discover and new and still amazing recipe. You may have forgotten to add the creamed soup at the "perfect moment", but it still got incorporated just perfectly and all was not lost. Even when you face an absolute disaster - while disappointing it can still be fun. And even when its done wrong - you still get to learn something. Also with cooking, doing it well takes practice. Very few people are perfect right out of the gate. Children can learn resilience as well as realize you don't have to be perfect at something from the start (a far cry from the 100's they often get on their school work).
Cooking fosters creativity. Just think of how many things can be added to pancake batter to make a new experience with every bite! We have added chocolate chips, mint chips, blue berries - so many wonderful things. I love putting out frosting and allowing my children to decorate cake waffles (cake batter cooked on a waffle maker) in any way their heart desires. Choosing the toppings for a pizza, deciding what veggies go on a platter - the possibilities are limited only be the imagination.
Cooking allows for individuality. My children now fully understand that everyone has different tastes. The understand one brother loves chocolate while the other isn't a big fan (although he did learn he likes Hersey kisses). My daughter loves to talk about how sometimes she likes chocolate and sometimes she doesn't. They know its okay for one to like white rice while the other rice pilaf. They love being able to chose maple syrup or peanut butter as a topping. I often times will set out a platter of 5 - 7 choices and allow them to build their own sandwich or salad.
Cooking allows them to try something new or go out on a limb in a safe environment. I love how we can explore ancient cultures and customs through food. My children can learn there is "good" and "bad" in all cultures in a safe way. I like the bread, but not the fruit. Its much nicer to show the diversity within people in this environment before we get to the bloody wars and battles! It also helps them to embrace newer cultures they are learning about. My children are learning Mandarin and they enjoy eating Chinese food and even had a wonderful Dim Sum meal following a class. We are now ready to try and make some of that on our own. We can see that it is okay to embrace some things from other cultures while not incorporating the totality of beliefs outside your own.
Cooking can provide gentle exposure for the senses. Many gifted children have overexcitabilities, and mine are no exception. They can be sensitive to textures, tastes, and smells. Cooking at home allows them to gently see what they can handle and what they can't. It also allows us to gently push the envelope to develop greater capacity.
Cooking has no age requirements. Many gifted children are ready for large challenges, but are often blocked through age requirements. With proper supervision, children can challenge themselves to their hearts content. Despite their age, no one can deny what they eventually produce. It breaks down the barrier. Cooking also allows for them to branch off into other areas. For instance, they may cook a meal- then present the historical significance of that meal. They may build a structure using food. They may produce an art project with food. They may do science project by using food. They may produce a recipe, then write a story surrounding that food.
Cooking links them to their family and culture. Being gifted often means being different. Cooking a family meal or a culturally significant dish links them to others in their "tribe". Something that isn't bound by intellect or what makes them different. Being unique is great, but sometimes we want to feel a part of something bigger than ourselves. Children that might fret about death or the future can see that some things last a long time - even beyond the brief time of particular individuals on earth. They can see for themselves they are connected to others, even while being unique themselves.
Finally, cooking allows for togetherness. I tend to be a distracted person and I love multitasking. Cooking with my kids requires me to give them my undivided attention at that time. They get all of me (or else the house might burn down!) and they enjoy that. There is no excuse for my lack of focus at times and I am working on that. In the meantime - kids to the kitchen!!
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Great Leaps Forward - thinking things through
One of the most interesting experiences in parenting gifted children is the "great leaps forward". Most people are familiar with amazing leaps children do as babies - the first time they roll over, crawl, walk or say "mommy". Children also complete intellectual leaps, and for gifted children those leaps can happen pretty often and be quite amazing.
Our twins just turned four years old, and the leaps they have bounded in the past couple of months have been quite amazing. For my son, his leaps have been in his amazing reasoning ability. When he isn't busy coming up with new games, running around the house, and overall being - well, a four year old - he likes to sit and talk. While the "quiet" one in our bunch (and quiet simply means not talking 23 1/3 hours a day), his soft observations of the world are quite profound. The kids had a hankering for pets, my eldest first thought he wanted a turtle, my daughter a butterfly, and her twin a bird. As we were driving to the pet store (to look only!) my bird lover started to tell me about the experiences he would have with his bird. "I will need to take him to the potty. I will have to hold him up will he poops so that he doesn't fall in". I know, potty talk from an almost four year old isn't "profound". But think about what he said. He was already thinking in details about the ways in which he would need to care for his pet. Now, we have a very active bird feeder in our yard and have identified almost ten different species that frequent the feeder almost daily - so he has seen birds quite a bit and know they don't come inside to use the potty. He realized that a pet bird would need to be taken care of differently than wild bird. He realized cleanliness would be important for a pet and he would need to be responsible for that. He understood his role would be that of protector and although he is small, he would be the one responsible for his pet. He was, in his young mid, thinking through the details of what would be needed to take good care of his pet. He was still a month shy of being four at this experience, still a baby himself in many ways, but he was able to mentally contemplate what would be needed for him to be in the role of caregiver - a sign not just of the ability to role play - but signs of empathy and compassion. This is a leap seen almost five years earlier than we would normally expect to see it. While we didn't leave the pet store with a bird, I left with a better understanding of the inner thoughts of my little thinker, my contemplater, my little guy who takes what to him are big problems and solves them quietly in his head. He will never ask for help while he is thinking and (like his father) will only speak when he feels like he has come up with a good and workable solution he can implement. Also like his father, those solutions often deal with self sacrifice so that others can helped, or happy, or a little more whole. Its funny, when people see my little guy they often say "oh, that one will keep your hands full". On the outside they see a little boy who is a ball of energy and a bit head strong. They will never hear his thoughts for taking care of his pet bird. He never shares his plans, goals, or ideas. He cherishes his thoughts and plans, he some how knows ideas have value and shouldn't be simply tossed around to those who won't appreciate that work that went in to forming them. He seems to have a built in protection system around his inner thoughts and his soul.
I wait in anticipation at what his young mind will bring forth. I often cut through the noise of the world to try to hear him every time quietly calls me name, finally ready to share with me a thought he has been wrestling with. Sometimes its about ways to tornado proof buildings, sometimes new games he has invented, sometimes he shares solutions to problems presented in stories we read, and sometimes its other gentle and loving ways to care for his future pet bird.
My son represents a segment of the gifted population many people never see until they do something great as adults. My son is brilliant, but he only performs "on paper" when he wants to . It will take a very skilled professional to accurately test his IQ - he simply has no mind to entertain questions he thinks are silly, stupid, or have more than one valid answer - so choosing just one answer makes no sense at all. I often tell my husband I think he is the most gifted of the bunch, not because of what he knows or retains, but because of the relationship he has with his own thoughts, his own mind. He is confident in his ability to think, to figure it out, to find a way - eventually. He trusts himself enough to wrestle with an issue, to turn it over in his head, to think about it and come up with a solution. And when he is ready to defend it, he is ready to speak it out.
His brother laughed when he talked of taking his bird to the potty. Unnerved him simply replied - my bird will be able to do it, I will train him, he will want to be clean and not have bird poop in his cage. You don't poop in your room, why should my bird poop in his. You know, I am fully convinced that given the time and the chance, there will be a toilet pooping bird in our home some day!
Our twins just turned four years old, and the leaps they have bounded in the past couple of months have been quite amazing. For my son, his leaps have been in his amazing reasoning ability. When he isn't busy coming up with new games, running around the house, and overall being - well, a four year old - he likes to sit and talk. While the "quiet" one in our bunch (and quiet simply means not talking 23 1/3 hours a day), his soft observations of the world are quite profound. The kids had a hankering for pets, my eldest first thought he wanted a turtle, my daughter a butterfly, and her twin a bird. As we were driving to the pet store (to look only!) my bird lover started to tell me about the experiences he would have with his bird. "I will need to take him to the potty. I will have to hold him up will he poops so that he doesn't fall in". I know, potty talk from an almost four year old isn't "profound". But think about what he said. He was already thinking in details about the ways in which he would need to care for his pet. Now, we have a very active bird feeder in our yard and have identified almost ten different species that frequent the feeder almost daily - so he has seen birds quite a bit and know they don't come inside to use the potty. He realized that a pet bird would need to be taken care of differently than wild bird. He realized cleanliness would be important for a pet and he would need to be responsible for that. He understood his role would be that of protector and although he is small, he would be the one responsible for his pet. He was, in his young mid, thinking through the details of what would be needed to take good care of his pet. He was still a month shy of being four at this experience, still a baby himself in many ways, but he was able to mentally contemplate what would be needed for him to be in the role of caregiver - a sign not just of the ability to role play - but signs of empathy and compassion. This is a leap seen almost five years earlier than we would normally expect to see it. While we didn't leave the pet store with a bird, I left with a better understanding of the inner thoughts of my little thinker, my contemplater, my little guy who takes what to him are big problems and solves them quietly in his head. He will never ask for help while he is thinking and (like his father) will only speak when he feels like he has come up with a good and workable solution he can implement. Also like his father, those solutions often deal with self sacrifice so that others can helped, or happy, or a little more whole. Its funny, when people see my little guy they often say "oh, that one will keep your hands full". On the outside they see a little boy who is a ball of energy and a bit head strong. They will never hear his thoughts for taking care of his pet bird. He never shares his plans, goals, or ideas. He cherishes his thoughts and plans, he some how knows ideas have value and shouldn't be simply tossed around to those who won't appreciate that work that went in to forming them. He seems to have a built in protection system around his inner thoughts and his soul.
I wait in anticipation at what his young mind will bring forth. I often cut through the noise of the world to try to hear him every time quietly calls me name, finally ready to share with me a thought he has been wrestling with. Sometimes its about ways to tornado proof buildings, sometimes new games he has invented, sometimes he shares solutions to problems presented in stories we read, and sometimes its other gentle and loving ways to care for his future pet bird.
My son represents a segment of the gifted population many people never see until they do something great as adults. My son is brilliant, but he only performs "on paper" when he wants to . It will take a very skilled professional to accurately test his IQ - he simply has no mind to entertain questions he thinks are silly, stupid, or have more than one valid answer - so choosing just one answer makes no sense at all. I often tell my husband I think he is the most gifted of the bunch, not because of what he knows or retains, but because of the relationship he has with his own thoughts, his own mind. He is confident in his ability to think, to figure it out, to find a way - eventually. He trusts himself enough to wrestle with an issue, to turn it over in his head, to think about it and come up with a solution. And when he is ready to defend it, he is ready to speak it out.
His brother laughed when he talked of taking his bird to the potty. Unnerved him simply replied - my bird will be able to do it, I will train him, he will want to be clean and not have bird poop in his cage. You don't poop in your room, why should my bird poop in his. You know, I am fully convinced that given the time and the chance, there will be a toilet pooping bird in our home some day!
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